I really hate nights like this, after my son had his emotional break down, and i will feel guilty because it must be my fault? i must be doing something wrong for him to feel alone and sad, or maybe its part of growing up, or maybe its because his dad just dont want him anymore and it will take a long, long time for him to heal.

You know this must stop now, do you hear me Universe, this will stop now, i want happy ness, i want good strong friendships that dont move away, because i want people to care truly about me, like i care, this lonely ness, this guilt, this feelings that dont have a name yet, need to stop now.

I am a stunning, pretty, smart and funny a true lady, and i deserve better, i want to be happy i want to smile and lough all the time, i want to play and i want to live. I have so much to give, and my son needs this too.